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You have to pick:

Go to jail for a crime you didn't commit
 
or
 
Be attracted to monkeys

 
Comments
jonnyt_

How attracted? Is it just a secret I bury deep down... or do I feel compelled to... ACT on it.

bryan.derksen

How bad is the crime, and how long is the prison term? Two days for petty theft, or life imprisonment for puppy molestation?

jonnyt_

I'm imagining a life sentence for the jail term.

Prairie.Bandit

Well, humans are... related to monkeys... and I'm sure there are some humans as dumb as monkeys... does that count?

jonnyt_

As an additional note, when I say "life sentence" I mean the standard 20 years in prison followed by parole

whargolflorp

I think it would be a rising attraction, that grows on you as time goes by.

danielkinane

Prairie Bandit, there's no need to insult the monkeys.

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