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Options 1070 to 1080
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Be an Ewok
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Have hands at the end of your legs
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Live as a Dwarf in the Dwarf Fortress universe
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Vomit marbles
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From now on your favorite food loses all flavor to you
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Have athletes foot
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Fight one hippo-sized hamster
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Win the lottery, tell all your friends you've won, start celebrating, but then, as you go to pick up your money you realize you read the ticket wrong and you didn't actually win
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Clean 12 pig pens
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Only be able to read things backwards