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Options 970 to 980
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Each morning your alarm clock squirts gravy on your face
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Never eat cereal again
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Get pinkeye
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Have car drive over your foot
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Be one of Santa's elves
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When you die you go on to a blissful afterlife AS LONG AS the last word you ever said was "sky". If that is not the case then you will instead go on to an afterlife of torment.
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A type of magical weapon is invented that transforms anyone caught within its area of effect into docile humanoid sheep. The governments of the world decide this is more humane and economical than regular guns and bombs and use sheep-guns and sheep-bombs in their place.
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Never take a good picture
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All your base are belong to us
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Live in a world without chairs